Hi... my name is Jenny. I was raped in April 1999.

One night I decided to go out with a friend, Sarah. A guy who I had previously been involved with invited us to his band practice. I had told him that I didn't want a physical relationship with him because he was too forceful. So he told me we could just be friends.

Sarah had been trying to get some pills. I still don't know what they were. She told me they would give me a light body buzz. I guess she had all ready talked to him about getting them. Well, I took a pill, and the last thing I remember was Sarah leaning over to kiss me. When I woke up the next morning I was laying naked in his bed. All I know is what they both told me. He had had sex with me. Sarah had had sex with me . And worst of all he video taped it.

After that I started skipping school a lot. I hated myself . I felt like it was my fault. People found out and were making fun of me and calling me slut. I was so depressed that my whole life seemed meaningless. One night I decided I could take it no more. I tried to kill myself.

My father found me. It broke his heart , I told him everything. I got counseling for a month. And I dropped out of school. I'm back in school now. I have a job and my friends. But I still don't forgive myself. I'm still healing and I feel like my wounds are just getting wider and deeper.

For anyone who reads this.... I will talk to you if you need me. I can't believe I finally found some release. Thank you for reading and understanding my story. I know I'm not alone. Another Survivor 10-8-99


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